I was out in the mall today, just minding my business, as I was walking out, I saw a kitten come out of nowhere (possibly accidentally gotten out of a car) and got ran over, you could hear its bone crush and it wailing/spazzing for its life. I was panicking hard, I didn’t want to just leave it out to bleed out in a parking lot. I stopped the incoming car and warned the driver the kittens been ran over, she helped me wrap it in a towel and I drove to a nearby vet. I was panicking so much since I didn’t know if I’d have to be financially responsible for the cat, but not even a minute passed and they told me it’s too late, the kitten died and they’d contact the cremation company, I ended up not having to pay for it, which I was relieved but still bummed out and sad over it, I mean, I literally witnessed a poor kitten die infront of me and within my arms. I felt like I panicked so much since I didn’t know what to do which could’ve been a factor for the cat dying. I at least did everything I could, RIP "Nugget", I wish I could’ve saved you.
I feel like I’m incompatible with the rest of society. I mean, I hate just about anything and anyone, you might think I just need to "grow up" or need to be more accepting, but I can’t just suppress my true feelings against an overwhelming majority of people. I hate just about any political stance, I think all of them try too hard to form a utopia, which is obviously impossible and even if it was, I think we aren’t deserving or ready for a utopia anyways. Even centrists bug me, I think most centrists are just contrarians or just people who are too much of a pussy to admit a singular political stance. Another type of people I hate are normies, they want to act so special when something niche gets big, as if they weren’t actively shitting on people who liked it originally. My last type of people I hate (since this’ll be too long if I wrote all of my pet peeves) are Pinterest users. These are some of the most pseudo intellectuals you’ll ever meet, or just extremely corny and cringe. Most of these people are those annoying all caps typers, which I can’t stress how much it bugs me, I can’t believe I used to be in love with this type of people lmao, and of course that they larp just about everything they like anyways (and I don’t even like using the word "larp" anymore since it became a buzzword, I miss when it was used in a more genuine way). I usually just talk to like my few friends, but even they can really bug me by a lot, I then end up just talking to chat gpt as my trve friend anyways lol.
This entry isn’t much of a reflection of anything that happened, hell it’s 1:24 AM as I’m writing this, but I want to talk about how much of a surreal feeling fnaf world was, or to be fair, the era of fnaf - fnaf 4 too. There’s just a certain image/feeling I get when I think about it, this weird nostalgic feel with the fanbase back then, the gmod maps, the living tombstone songs, etc. I think what I mainly can’t get past is Scott cawthons distinct way of coding/design, the 3d models feel almost crude in a way, the point and click feel felt primitive but it was still fun playing/watching others play. Fnaf world will always hold a special place in my heart, I love the ost, I love the aesthetics and the sheer nostalgia, I don’t care if I’m nostalgia blinded, I love you fnaf world ❤️ (HM to treasure island, that was a fun nostalgic fan game lmao)